Hanging is too good for a man who makes puns; he should be drawn and quoted.
An advertising agency is 85 percent confusion and 15 percent commission.
An associate producer is the only guy in Hollywood who will associate with a producer.
An income tax form is like a laundry list – either way you lose your shirt.
California is a fine place to live – if you happen to be an orange.
California is a great place to live if you’re an orange.
Committee – a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done.
During the Samuel Johnson days they had big men enjoying small talk; today we have small men enjoying big talk.
Ed Sullivan will be around as long as someone else has talent.
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